7 Things You Need to Know Before Choosing Your Ring Bearer

cute kids at weddings
Photo via Aaron Watson Photography

First things first: You DO NOT have to have a ring bearer, or even a flower girl for that matter. They are not required, even if you know a ton of adorable kids who would love to have the role. OK, now that THAT’S out of the way. If you want to have a ring bearer, here’s what you need to know.

1. Who Should You Pick to Be Ring Bearer?

Typically the ring bearer is the nephew of the bride or groom, or the child of the maid of honor, best man, or other close friend. If you or your SO have a son that is perhaps too young to be in your wedding party, this is a great role for them as well (same goes for your daughter if she’s young enough to be the flower girl).

2. How Old Should the Ring Bearer Be?

Well, we have actually seen grandparents or older family friends be flower girls and ring bearers (this grandmother made an adorable flower girl), so you could technically choose someone young or older for the role! But typically ring bearers are anywhere from 2 to 8-years-old. But keep in mind that two might be a bit more unpredictable, so check with their parents to see how they might take to the responsibility.

SEE MORE:15 Times Kids Melted Our Hearts at Weddings

3. What Should He Wear?

This absolutely depends on your wedding attire, but he should be dressed similarly to the groomsmen (IE: if they are wearing suits he should wear a little suit, or if they’re wearing tuxedos he could look adorable in one as well).

4. Does the Ring Bearer Have to Be a Boy?

Not at all! The ring bearer can be a girl, too! 🙂

5. Who Pays?

Their parents would typically pay for their attire, though if you wish to give them something to wear as a gift that is always an option. You would also pay for a ring pillow or other accessory.

6. Does the Ring Bearer Actually Carry the Rings?

Our advice? No. We suggest the best man carry the rings instead. Read more about who holds the rings during the ceremony, here!

7. Are They Invited to the Reception?

This is definitely up to you, and is something you should decide before you ask a little one to be in your wedding. If you are inviting other children to the reception, then they would be invited and would sit with their parents or in a designated kids area (if you are providing supervision). If you do not want children at the reception then we think it would be generous to let the parents know and pick up the cost of a sitter yourself (since you asked them to be in the wedding). Read more about how to hire a wedding babysitter here!

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