12 Funny Wedding Vows to Use At Your Wedding

Photo by Two Irises

Photo by Two Irises

Aiming to insert a little humor into your wedding vows? Incorporate these funny wedding vows below into your ceremony, or use them as inspiration to get your guests laughing.

Looking for something different? These love quotes are PERFECT for romantic wedding vows.

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“I promise to comfort you when the Falcons lose and drink beer with you when they win.” (Source)

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“I promise to buy taller shoes so you can wear heels.” (Source)

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“In sickness and in health: I promise to take care of you, even when you’ve over-indulged the night before. For richer or for poorer: I promise not to spend all our money at Nordstrom.” (Source)

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I promise to love and cherish you as much as I do our dog, Spot. From this day forward, I will lint roll the chairs whenever your parents visit. I will love you in sickness and in health, as long as you take care of the vet visits. I promise to cuddle with you as much as I do Spot and pick you up treats whenever he gets some, too. (Source)

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I John, take you Mary, to be my lawfully wedded wife.

To be together in happiness and strife,

To have and to hold,

Even if your cooking grows mold.

I love you in richness and in debt,

And cherish all moments since we have met.

I promise to love you until the end of my days,

As long as you stay out of my baseball plays.

I pledge to be faithful

Even when we’re old and dull. (Source)

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Do you take Steven to be your husband,

to have and to hold from this day forward for better or for worse,

for richer or for poorer,

in sickness and in health,

to love and to cherish until death or zombies do you part? (Source)

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I, Christian, choose you, Sara, to be my wife. Before our friends and family gathered here I promise to love and cherish you throughout the good times and bad times. I promise to try to remember to put down the toilet seat, and to replace the toilet roll when it finishes. I promise to remember this day with love and roses. I will love you always. (Source)

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I Victor, take you Alexis, to be my lawfully wedded wife. I promise to love you for eternity and to trust you with my credit card, even if it means passing out when I get the credit card bill. You’re my wife and you deserve the best! (Source)

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I Stephanie promise to love you, Leo, even though you have a love for ‘80s hair band music. I promise I will try to love Motley Crue as much as you do, and will even dress up in ‘80s clothing and see a live concert with you- and I won’t even complain the entire time. You’ll be my personal rock star and I will love every moment of it. (Source)

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I Michael, take you, Jessica to be my lawfully wedded wife and chief tennis doubles partner, for richer, for poorer, for better, for worse, in sickness and in health, for when we win and the very, very rare occasion when we lose. I promise to love, honor, and cherish you, to return your serves and do my best not to foot fault. This I vow to you. (Source)

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I promise to do the stuff neither of us wants to do, if you really don’t want to do it more than I don’t. (Source)

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I, Fred, take you Ginger, to be my lawfully wedded wife.

To be together in happiness and strife,

To have and to hold,

Even if your cooking grows mold.

I love you in richness and in debt,

And cherish all moments since we have met.

I promise to love you until the end of my days,

As long as you stay out of my baseball plays.

I pledge to be faithful

Even when we’re old and dull.

(Source)

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