I’ve actually gotten into arguments with friends over Gwyneth Paltrow and her GOOP newsletters. Some people are not fans, but I just happen to really like her. And yes, I may or may not be known to verbally attack Internet commenters/haters on her behalf. Because of this, I’m pretty sure IRL she would want to be best friends with me. If that ever happened, I would dedicate this song to her:
Today’s “Do” Goop newsletter (if you’re not familiar with them, they’re categorized by Make, Go, Get, Do, Be, See) is a step-by-step guide from her makeup artist Emma Lovell on how to effectively do both daytime and nighttime makeup looks, and tips on how to transition from one to the other with a few simple tricks.
If you’re doing your own makeup for your wedding, a guide like this is essential. First things first is to make sure you have the right products. Essentials listed in this newsletter include:
moisturizer
foundation
setting powder for t-zone
cream blush
cream eyeshadow
highlighter
liquid and kohl eyeliner
makeup brushes
concealer
eyelash curler
mascara
lipliner, lipstick, lipgloss
What I learned from having my own makeup done is that hydration is the key. Make sure your skin is THOROUGHLY moisturized for several days leading up to the event (and really, forever after that). It doesn’t matter how good your makeup job is, if your skin is dry and flakey, it is not going to look good.
If you come from a divorced family, wedding invitation wording can become a pretty tedious process. Even if you’re not in a blended family, it can be nerve-racking trying to make sure you get your wedding invitations “just right” without managing to piss off a family member. Between knowing what to capitalize, who’s paying for what and when they should be included, or whether or not you want more traditional or casual wording, wedding invitations require more than a few minutes of your time. Use this handy list to help you figure out just what to say on yours.
The Who/What
Bride’s parents are hosting in a religious venue:
Mr. and Mrs. David Thomas Jacoby
request the honour of your presence
at the marriage of their daughter
Michelle Katherine
to
Michael Gavin Jones
Bride’s parents are hosting in a non-religious venue:
Mr. and Mrs. David Thomas Jacoby
request the pleasure of your company
at the marriage of their daughter
Michelle Katherine
to
Michael Gavin Jones
*NOTE: Even though the bride’s parents are hosting, I think it’s nice to add in the groom’s parents names as well.
Here’s how you would do that:
Mr. and Mrs. David Thomas Jacoby
request the pleasure of your company
at the marriage of their daughter
Michelle Katherine
to
Michael Gavin Jones
son of Mr. and Mrs. Edward Phillip Jones
Groom’s parents are hosting in a non-religious venue:
Mr. and Mrs. Edward Phillip Jones
request the pleasure of your company
at the marriage of
Michelle Katherine Jacoby
to their son
Michael Gavin Jones
Both parents host in a religious venue:
Mr. and Mrs. David Jacoby
and
Mr. and Mrs. Edward Jones
request the honour of your presence
at the marriage of
Michelle Katherine
to
Michael Gavin Jones
NOTE: The bride’s parents come first
Couple hosting in a religious venue:
The honour of your presence
is requested at the marriage of
Michelle Katherine
and
Michael Gavin Jones
Couple hosting in a non-religious venue:
Together with their parents
Michelle Katherine
and Michael Gavin Jones
request the pleasure of your company
at the celebration of their marriage
Couple hosting, simple:
Michelle Jacoby and Michael Jones
invite you to celebrate their marriage
Everyone hosts in a non-religious venue:
Ms. Michelle Katherine Jacoby
and
Mr. Michael Gavin Jones
together with their parents
Mr. and Mrs. David Jacoby
Mr. and Mrs. Edward Jones
request the pleasure of your company
at their wedding
If you or your groom have divorced parents, remember these rules:
Names are listed on separate lines without an “and” between them
Mom always comes first.
If the bride’s mother is not remarried, use “Ms.” followed by her first name and the last name she is currently using (maiden or still her married name)
Traditionally, even if the bride’s parents are remarried, you only list the parents names on the invite (though I think that’s outdated!). Here’s an example:
Ms. Susan Smith
Mr. David Jacoby
request the honour of your presence
at the marriage of their daughter
Michelle Katherine Jacoby
to
Michael Gavin Jones
However, obviously if you’re just as close to your step-parent as you are your biological parent, you won’t want to leave them out! If the brides’ parents are divorced and remarried, you would include the mother and step-father first, then the father and step-mother second:
Mr. and Mrs. John Hamilton
Mr. and Mrs. David Jacoby
request the honour of your presence
at the marriage of their daughter
Michelle Katherine Jacoby
to
Michael Gavin Jones
NOTE: In this instance you include the bride’s last name since it’s not obvious what it might be after her parents’ divorce
If you want to include the groom’s divorced parents on the invite, and the father is remarried but the mother is not (but still has her married name) it would look like this:
Ms. Susan Smith
Mr. David Jacoby
request the honour of your presence
at the marriage of their daughter
Michelle Katherine Jacoby
to
Michael Gavin Jones
son of
Ms. Shirley Jones
Mr. and Mrs. Edward Jones
If a widowed parent is hosting:
Mrs. David Jacoby
requests the honour of your presence
at the marriage of her daughter
Michelle Katherine
If a living parent has remarried, a nice way to include a deceased parent would be:
Mr. and Mrs. William Rafferty
request the pleasure of your company
at the marriage of her daughter
Michelle Katherine Jacoby
daughter of the late Mr. David Jacoby
to Michael Gavin Jones
More tips for the Who/What:
No abbreviations should be used. (The only exceptions are Mrs., Mr., and Ms.) Spell out formal titles such as Doctor, Reverend, Captain.
“Request the honour of your presence” is traditionally only used if the ceremony is taking place in a house of worship. Otherwise you should use “Ppleasure of your company.”
Formal tradition says the word honor has a “u” in it, as is the traditional British spelling. However, if you want to make it more casual, nobody will care if you omit it.
Only use bride’s first and middle name. The only exception is when brides’ last name is different than parents, or when it is unclear which name she uses, in the case of divorced parents.
Jewish faith calls for an “and” instead of “to” between the bride and groom’s names.
“Mr.” is formally used for the groom, but it is not necessary and can be omitted if you’re going more casual.
Same is true for using your parents’ middle names. Technically if you are using your own middles names, you are supposed to use your parents’ as well. But in the effort of saving space you do not have to. Either use the full middle name or none at all (no initials).
The When/Where
Saturday, the eighteenth of June
two thousand and eleven
at half after seven o’clock
The Wedding Room
5434 Wedding Avenue
Baltimore, Maryland
Dinner and dancing to follow
NOTE: The spacing depends on your invitation design. It’s expected that you’ll put spaces between several of the elements (such as the location, dinner/dancing parts, etc.)
If your ceremony is held one place and your reception at another, you should consider using a reception card so your wedding invitation doesn’t get too wordy. However, if you would like to have all the information on the invite, you can do this:
Saturday, the eighteenth of June
two thousand and eleven
at half after seven o’clock
Temple Beth Am
Miami
and afterward at the reception
The Wedding Room
More tips for the When/Where:
For a formal invitation…
You can include “on” before the date, but it is not necessary. (IE: On Saturday, the eighteenth of June.)
Do not use abbreviations for anything. (IE: Spell out the year completely, as well as the State.)
Spell out numbers, except in the address.
For the numbers 21 through 29 and 31, use a hyphen to connect the two words. For example, the number 28 would be written as “twenty-eighth.”
You do not need to clarify “afternoon” or “evening” unless the wedding is at 8, 9, or 10 o’clock.
Do not use “a.m. or p.m.” as they are abbreviations.
Use “half after” not “past” for the time.
No punctuation is used, except when separating two phrases on the same line (such as “Saturday, the sixteenth of October) or for listing City/State
Only capitalize proper nouns, a new thought (such as Dinner and dancing), or words that are normally capitalized (such as a State).
Zip codes are not included.
Bringing it all together
Mr. and Mrs. David Thomas Jacoby
request the pleasure of your company
at the marriage of their daughter
Michelle Katherine
to
Michael Gavin Jones
son of Mr. and Mrs. Edward Phillip Jones
Saturday, the eighteenth of June
two thousand and eleven
at half after seven o’clock
The Wedding Room
5434 Wedding Avenue
Baltimore, Maryland
As I’ve mentioned before, the DJ at my wedding went a little “rogue.” Despite spending months working on a 70+ song playlist (which the DJ company provided an easy online database for), selecting songs that we would like (The Smiths, Arcade Fire, T.V. On the Radio) AND our parents and their friends would like (Lionel Ritchie, Otis Redding, Neil Diamond) the DJ managed to overlook 90% of the songs we asked for. When he did finally get one right, it would be the wrong version (he thought Lynyrd Skynyrd’s ”Free Bird” was a rap song).
After countless trips up to the DJ stand to ask “What IS this?!,” I finally decided to give up and give in. Besides, after my 5th glass of Prosecco I didn’t care if I was dancing to the Isley Brothers or David Bowie. Thankfully, when I told the owner what happened a week later, he ended up giving us a partial refund, taking $500 off the final price. However, I would have much rather paid $500 more to have a DJ that understood what we wanted.
That led me to reach out to Scratch Weddings, a DJ company that matches up world-famous DJs for weddings and events, so I could find out what bride-to-be’s should do to get a DJ they’ll be happy with. Scratch started as a DJ Academy in 2002 (co-developed by Jam Master Jay of Run DMC), and has since become a leading source of marquee DJs. With over 15,000 weddings and events under their belts, they’ve pleased clients ranging from major luxury hotel chains (W) and cool stores (Urban Outfitters) to major television networks (MTV).
I spoke with one of their top DJ’s, Vida Ventura, about the DJ selection process, and how a couple can make sure they get the right DJ for their musical tastes. The Q&A is below:
Woman Getting Married: What should bride-to-be’s look for in a DJ company? How do they know it’s a good fit for them?
DJ Vida Ventura: I shop at a store where there’s a giant rock with a policy that should apply to DJ companies, too:
Rule 1: The customer is always right.
Rule 2: If the customer is ever wrong, reread Rule 1
Any DJ company that does more talking than listening probably doesn’t have a customer-first mentality. If you and your fiancé take your music seriously, don’t settle for less than someone who truly knows your favorite tracks and artists and can demonstrate that expertise. One size does not fit all!
You should also make sure your DJ company has 100% positive reviews on sites like WeddingWire, The Knot and Yelp, and is listed with the Better Business Bureau in the unlikely event you need help resolving a business dispute. Make sure the company has full liability insurance coverage, because your wedding venue is going to require it. Finally, make sure the DJ you select is someone you’d actually want to be part of your special day.
How can a couple make sure they have the same musical taste as the DJ? Should a couple ask the DJ what music he/she knows best and is most comfortable playing?
A DJ’s biography should reveal what kind of genres they know. If all they’ve done is spin weddings, you can expect less musical range and skill than someone who has held residencies in clubs or lounges, or a DJ who has opened for touring indy rock bands. So your first step should be to review the professional background of the DJ you are considering.
When you speak with the DJ, you should absolutely ask questions about his or her style and comfort in spinning various genres, including those preferred by the wedding couple. Listen to the prospective DJ’s mixing style. Talk about whether you like scratching and mashups, and whether you mind frequent transitions as opposed to longer tracks.
Do you recommend the bride/groom giving a playlist to the DJ, or letting the DJ do their own thing? Can a couple give you a 100-song list of songs they want to hear, or is that a bad idea?
It’s never a bad idea to give a bride what she wants! I welcome as much input as I can get, because it ensures that the bride and groom will hear all their favorites all night long. They won’t know exactly when a particular track is going to play, and hearing it will make the party that much better.
That said, there are couples who provide pretty general musical instructions and that’s fine, too. Good DJ’s are experts at reading the crowd and keeping the dance floor full.
How do you keep a happy medium between the older adults at a wedding and the younger guests who want to listen to bands their parents have never heard of?
One of the advantages of hiring a DJ is the opportunity to include a variety of music to please a wide range of guests. A DJ has to seamlessly move from genre to genre to keep all guests, both young and old, on the dance floor. Guests are surprised we can transition from disco to hip-hop to Ella Fitzgerald to top 40. And we do it in a way that builds energy and keeps every generation involved. One trick I like to use to perk up the oldsters in the room is to spin a modern cover of an older song.
Are there any musical trends at weddings you’re seeing recently?
Mashups are certainly in. The popularity of the TV show Glee has shown how much fun it is to take a song like Elvis Presley’s original “Can’t Help Falling in Love” and mash it with UB40′s remake. You can also mix two different tunes, such as “Holiday” by Madonna with Lady GaGa’s “Alejandro” so that the beats and lyrics flow together.
Is there a formula you tend to follow for each wedding (such as slower music at dinner, dance music after), or is every wedding different?
Every wedding is different. Some have a string quartet or a jazz ensemble during cocktails, while others ask me to play music the bride and groom love, but the stuff that’s not particularly danceable. I actually recorded a video on this topic, along with a Scratch colleague, Jay Jung. He looks at the wedding music very scientifically, like a bell curve, starting slowly and building energy. Here’s a link to the video.
Even though I gave my wedding DJ a list of songs I wanted, he actually played the wrong versions of several of them, or forgot to play them altogether. Do you recommend a couple checking in with the DJ and going over their intended playlist before the event?
Yes. Music is such an important part of the wedding, you’ll want to make sure all the worry and doubt is removed well ahead of the reception. Part of the Scratch Weddings process is to meet in the weeks prior to the wedding to confirm details of the play list and the no-play list, the order of events during the wedding day and even the specific pronunciations of wedding party VIPs, so no names get butchered. Our advice to couples is to be very precise about what songs absolutely must be played, and even the specific version of the song that should be used. Details are important.
DJ Vida Ventura got her start at Lower East Side hot spots and LA nightclubs, and has since gone on to highly-sought after DJ appearances everywhere from Munich to the Winter Music Conference and Art Basel in Miami. Vida’s style is “eclectic and energetic,” and she says she is passionate about bringing her skills to couples looking for a fresh, fun take on a wedding DJ. “I love to mix genres and play everything from James Brown to Michael Jackson to Beyoncé in the same set and appeal to everyone at the wedding.”
To learn more about Scratch Weddings or to book them for your wedding, click here.
NOTE: This is NOT a sponsored post…We don’t have any of those on WGM. I simply interview companies/event designers/planners, etc., that I think are good at what they do!
Just when you think you’re DONE with everything “wedding” after the big day, think again! Sure, there are the thank-you notes, but you can knock those out in a few nights. The real pain in the butt (albeit a fun pain in the butt…sort of) is trying to decide which wedding photos you want to show off. Depending on what kind of wedding photo package you opted for (and how much you paid), you’ll most likely just end up with a CD of the final high-resolution images. Your photographer might also offer to do an album for you, or print selected images for you and your family. Chances are, however, that both of those options will be pricier than if you did it yourself. So, what should you do with your wedding photos? The answer is: print them yourself!
Being the OCD bride that I am, I wanted to find the best printers I could for my wedding photos, and at the best price. But when I started the process, I had a hard time deciding what the best option was. I figured other brides were probably having the same problem, too, so I decided to go a step further and, for research purposes for this site, test out several photo printing options and document the outcome. The results are below…I hope you find them helpful!
NOTE: Having worked for major magazines and websites, I’ve been lucky enough to learn about the photo editing process. It has definitely helped me determine image quality, which was extremely useful for comparison purposes on this post!
My dining room table, a.k.a “the lab”
Commercial Photo Lab:
I decided to research where the best photo lab was in Nashville, and I came upon one that was recommended by a lot of local photographers who do professional shoots for recording artists. Surely, they MUST be great, I told myself. I got their pricing list, which seemed extremely high but I figured I had to pay for quality, right? Here’s what they offered:
Paper: Kodak Endura
Price for custom (lab corrected) prints:
5×7: $15.00/$12.00 (for the 2-5th print of the same image) 8×10: $18.00/$14.40 8.5×11: $19.20/$15.36 11×14: $24.70/$19.76
Review:
Because several of my images had to be cropped (nothing major, and pretty much exactly what anybody knows how to do themselves on a computer), they considered my order a “custom print,” which meant higher prices. The turnaround time was three days, and I didn’t have to deal with shipping because it was local. My order contained color, black and white, and a sepia-ish tone for one photo. I ordered a Luster finish (also called Lustre), because that is what my photographers recommended. It is not quite matte and not quite glossy…it’s somewhere in between.
The color ones turned out great…probably as sharp as I’ve ever seen a color photo. The black and whites, however, were too dark. One photo had me looking like I had a bad case of 1980′s blush (remember when it was cool to apply your makeup blush in a thick line?). The “almost” sepia photo had a great tint on the original photo, but the printers made it a straight black and white photo and it just wasn’t the same. I asked them to lighten up the Black and Whites, as well as try to match the original sepia-like tone of the one photo, which they did but not without a little bit of ‘tude. When they did make the correction, they turned out great. However, I left there feeling broke and a bit frustrated considering how much I paid.
$200 poorer, I decided to research and find out where the top wedding photographers get their prints made. And which wedding photographer is better known than the talented Jose Villa? Since he never had a chance to reply to my e-mail asking him to tell you, my lovely readers, WHERE you should get your photos printed and how the process works (no hard feelings, Jose, I know you’re busy!), I decided to use my 007 web research skills and just find out myself! Turns out Jose’s photo lab of choice is Richard Photo Lab in Los Angeles. I was thrilled to find out that you can go to their website and order your prints online. I was even MORE thrilled when I saw their prices.
You can order non-lab corrected prints, but it’s such a small price difference that you might as well just have them do it for you!
Review:
When you go to the website, you are prompted to download a RPLPrints application. The application itself is a little outdated, but it gets the job done. You select the size of the photo you want, the paper type (matte or glossy) and tone (Color, BW, Sepia). You then add it to your cart. From your cart you can edit the photo by changing the alignment (vertical or horizontal), crop it to where you want by zooming in and out, or play with the photo alignment by free-rotating it. The checkout process gets a little confusing, and you don’t always know what has gone through or not, but overall the process was easy enough to figure out after awhile. You have an option to package the photos in nice proof boxes (starting at $5.98-$138). Shipping was pricey, however, and cost around $9.00 for only 6 prints.
RPLPrints.com online ordering screen
I was impressed when I got a call from the lab when they were unsure about something in my order, so I got the feeling this was a small lab and not a factory that just churned out orders. I got the prints in a few days, and was happy, especially considering how much less I had spent compared to the Nashville lab. The color photos turned out great, and they nailed the Sepia tone of the one photo without me even having to ask them (take that, Nashville). However, my only complaint (and it’s small) is that the black and whites were not as crisp/sharp as my other ones, but it was not something I felt the need to fix. While I was happy with the quality of my prints, RPL (like the commercial photo lab, above) doesn’t have an easy way to share the photos with family members online so they can order their own prints. so I had to move on…
Now that I felt like I had seen the “best,” having used the same printer top wedding photographers use as well as an overpriced photolab in Nashville used by record labels and pro-photographers, I still hadn’t figured out how to share the photos with my family, and how to make sure they could get great quality prints for a fair price. So, I figured I’d try an online printer everybody has heard about and seems to get good online reviews: Snapfish.
Paper: Fuji Crystal Archive
Price for prints: 5×7: $0.79/$0.69 (for 11-24 prints) 8×10: $2.99
There is no option for lab-corrected prints
Review:
I went with Snapfish versus Kodak or Shutterfly because I had read favorable reviews online, and also I had attempted to upload all of my wedding photos to both Kodak and Shutterfly, but the entire process was way too long for the high-res files. The process for Snapfish was extremely easy, and you could edit the photos before you printed them (by cropping, rotating, or even adding effects to them or changing the tint from color to black and white.) There was not an option to have their labs color-correct them, but they did have an auto color-correct as well as an option to lighten or darken the image. Normally this would work out fine, but with important photos (like wedding photos), it’s nice to know that someone is going to adjust them for you if they need to be fixed. There weren’t that many options for photo sizes (4X6-8×10), but shipping was super cheap (I paid $1.48 for 7 prints) and I got the photos in a few days.
The Snapfish.com ordering screen
While the prices might have been great, the print quality of the photos was not as good as the first two labs. The black and white was TOO bright, and looked washed out (that was true for the 8 x10′s, however the 5 X7′s were good), and the detail for the color prints was not as sharp as the commercial lab or RPL. I experimented with their two different photo finish options (matte versus glossy), and it just confirmed that matte/luster is always the better option. If you’re going to be framing these photos, DO NOT get glossy. You will always have a glare, and it just somehow looks cheaper. Now I was back to square one: I had a great way to show the photos to family and an easy way for them to print them, but I didn’t love the quality. So I kept searching…
I did a lot of online research to find out which online photo lab photographers tend to gravitate towards, and that led me to SmugMug. They are a paid digital photo sharing service and lab that a lot of pro-photographers use as a way to offer their prints to clients. They also offer fun merchandising options for your prints, such as mousepads, mugs, framed prints, and coasters. I paid $40 for a year-long subscription, which allowed me to create a private photo gallery as well as a password protected link I could send to family/friends. I uploaded my wedding photos, organized them based on sequence of events (rehearsal dinner, ceremony, reception, etc.), and edited/cropped several of them. There are tons of photo size options (4X6 up to 24X36) and three photo finish options (matte, lustre, and glossy).
Paper: Kodak Endura
Price for prints (Lustre option): 5×7: $0.99 8×10: $2.49 8×12: $3.99
Review:
SmugMug makes it extremely easy to upload photos and organize them. It took a bit of time to put them in the exact order that I wanted (I had to do a lot of dragging to rearrange), and a couple times I actually had to go back after I had saved the order I wanted the photos in and do it again because it would revert back. However, once I got the hang of it, it worked fine. The ordering process was super easy, which is great for parents and relatives that might not be very web-savvy (we all have at least one in our family). As soon as I got the photos uploaded and arranged, I sent the link out in an email along with the password, and parents and relatives have been able to easily order the prints they want.
The SmugMug.com ordering screen
Shipping was very reasonable ($4.95 for 8 prints), and I got them in just a couple of days.The overall cost of the prints was great, and I was even happier when I received the photos. SmugMug.com uses the same paper (Kodak Endura) as the pricey commerical photo lab, for 1/15 the cost. And the quality was nearly identical! The color photos were just as good, and the black and whites were spot-on without me having to tell them to fix it. Overall, I couldn’t have asked for anything better.
Color Photos: A+ B&W: A+ Cost: A+
WGM Cliffs Notes:
Overall, SmugMug.com offers the best online photo printing/sharing services, with the best quality for the price.
Order your wedding photo prints with a Lustre (or Luster) finish. They’re better than glossy.
As a newly engaged writer, I had a hard time finding the practical information I needed to plan my wedding. While the wedding books, magazines, and websites I read had pretty pictures, they seemed to just skim the surface when it came to providing helpful ways for me to create the wedding of my dreams. Now that I'm married, I hope this blog serves as a resource for all you other bride-to-be's, with unique ideas for wedding venues, wedding decorations, wedding dresses, and more!
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